"Fighting The Lie"

       We have all had moment of insecurity in our lives and if we have strong confidence in ourselves we are able to surpass them. There are those times when the people we love strengthen those insecurities by the things they say to us. If they love us back it is never intentional, but what about the people we have loved that didn't love us back. How can we fight the lies that were told to us to make us feel bad about ourselves. I can't count how many lies my ex told me to make me feel insecure. The things he put into my head to make me feel as if I was the one who had the problem when truthfully he is the one who ruin our relationship.
      I have never met anyone who was so deceived and gave themselves so many excuses for wrong behavior before in my LIFE. In fact, I can't even begin to understand how someone can be so blind that they remain a victim even when they are the one who is hurting others. I never met anyone like this until I met my ex and I am fighting the lies to this day. Its hard when the people who know him believe the lies to. It makes you second guess yourself and wonder if you are INDEED the problem.
      I just recently came from the state he lives in after taking my son there to be with his family. Before I left I was positive that I was strong enough to deal with whatever was thrown at me, but while there and after being around him I began to feel like I was once again being sucked into a black hole of insecurity and second guessing myself and I realized... This man will NEVER change, but I MUST. In order for me to deal with him being the father of my child for the rest of my son's life I have to stop being victimized by him! If he wants to play the victim, let him. But I cannot allow myself to be one. "Life is too short to have a victim mentality, Say to yourself 'I am not going to be bitter, I am going to be better'" ~Unknown. That is exactly what I plan to do! I refuse to be the VICTIM and I refuse to be BITTER because at the end of the day we CHOOSE happiness and in order to stay happy I have to let the things that make me sad GO.

     So, I have let HIM go.... no more trying to co-parent with someone who is slowly destroying me. My son is too young to even appreciate my efforts, so for now i will focus on bettering myself and being more confident again. Not hiding behind false conceit! I must say its only been two weeks and I feel amazing. So if you are struggling with fighting lies, stop fighting.... and just LET IT GO. You will be amazed at how much happier you feel.